Dear Mom Who Was In Tears Today

I bent down and looked into the refrigerator.  Everyone had already eaten without me, and the kids had already put the food away as they began their kitchen clean-up routine.  (Lest you be jealous that my kids were cleaning the kitchen for me — don't.  This is simply the training stage right now.  You can be jealous in a couple years when it's actually clean after they've cleaned it.  But hey, they're learning.)

I was so hungry.  My blood sugar was way too low and I was shaking.  I try to be very good about keeping myself fed, but today had just been one of those days where I couldn't seem to get the timing right.  Every time I tried to get a bite to eat, my precious little 7 week old decided it was her turn to eat first.

I hadn't felt very productive with the housework that day either.  She just needed a lot more attention than usual – probably going through a growth spurt – plus there was the usual grind of life with all the other kids.

As I dug through the refrigerator to figure out which container held the remainder of dinner, hoping that they had even saved me any, my hands were shaking so badly that I was dropping things on the floor.  I needed to eat – NOW – but it didn't seem like it would be an easy feat to get my food served up without creating an even bigger mess in the kitchen as I dropped food and dishes.

In an instant, tears welled up in my eyes and spilled down my cheeks.  The hunger of the moment and the weariness of the day had finally gotten to me.

As I stood up and closed the refrigerator, what should be staring me in the face but a little magnet containing a Scripture verse that was exactly what I needed to see in that moment!

“They that sow in tears shall reap in joy.”  (Psalm 126:5)

I caught my breath, in awe that God should encourage me with a verse about tears just as my own tears had begun to flow.

It seemed such a pathetic, unimportant thing that I should be in tears over being hungry and tired.

But God cared.

In another instant, another verse came to mind:

“And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.” (Galatians 6:9)

That encouragement from God's Word gave me more energy than the food I consumed a few minutes later.

God gave me such a timely reminder that the daily grind of motherhood is worth it!  In due season
I will reap the harvest of all these days of hard work.

The sacrifice of my time and effort, and yes, even of a meal on occassion, will be rewarded with the pleasure of knowing my children have experienced a lifetime of learning about the love of the Savior both through my words and my actions.

So, dear mama who was in tears today, remember this:

 They that sow in tears shall reap in joy.

The Secret to Becoming a Less Grouchy Mom

The morning started out nicely enough.  I got up early, read my Bible, and then sent out an email about how things are going a lot more smoothly now that we're getting to bed earlier and we are getting into a good morning routine.

We finished up breakfast and tidied up the house, then got started on homeschooling for the day.  Sounds like we have the perfect little family, doesn't it?

But 5 minutes into the school day, things changed a little bit.

The table was covered in piles of stuffed animals that the kids thought should join them.  I couldn't think with the mess.  One seat is vacant because a child had already had a melt-down and was in her room until she could calm down.

The toddler was sitting on the table, and I was shushing her every few minutes so I could teach.

Thankfully the baby was being a sweetheart (she's such a good baby!), but it wasn't long after this that I had to excuse myself to take care of her blowout diaper.

The rest of the day never did get quite back on track.

There were more melt-downs.  There were attitudes.  There was a toddler potty-training accident and a bunch of toilet paper shoved down the bathroom sink drain. (I'm sure that will make my husband's day better when he arrives home from work.)  There was an impromptu bath after the accident and another accident (of the grosser variety) while she was in the bathtub.

There were interruptions and inconveniences galore.

But I didn't have a horrible day.

Now, I want to be careful with this next part because I don't want to sound all pious and like I'm little miss perfect who always has a great attitude.

Because I don't.

But, the reason I didn't have a horrible day is that I'm learning (ever so slowly) a very important lesson that is greatly helping me as I persevere through this season of motherhood.

I'm learning the lesson of expectation.

I've come to realize that my expectations of motherhood started out all wrong.  I spent a lot of time frustrated because things weren't working out like I thought they should.

I felt like the house should stay tidy all the time, the children should be sweet, and we should cuddle up and read books all day.

Anything outside of that ideal was, in my mind, a deviation from the norm and needed to be rectified as soon as possible.

A potty training accident?  What an inconvenience!  Sigh.
A melt-down?  Are you serious? Child, do you know how much I'd like to be snuggling with you right now with a book?  But I can't because you are interrupting the flow of our day!

But over time, I've come to realize a simple, yet life-changing truth.

Life isn't perfect.

Imperfection is the norm. And any day that ends uneventfully is actually the deviation from the norm.

Once I figured that out, I started to take things like having toilet paper shoved down the sink with a lot more grace and a lot fewer sighs.

Don't get me wrong.  I'm not saying I like it when those things happen.  And I'm not saying we should just run our homes with a whatever-goes attitude without having guidelines in place to keep things flowing as smoothly as possible.

But…messes and kids just go hand in hand.

Motherhood is hard work, plain and simple.

In fact, there are way more “hard work” moments than there are commercial-worthy, happy, cuddly family moments.

Are the feel good moments worth every ounce of hard work that I put in every day?  A thousand times yes.

But I need to remember to expect the hard work rather than treating it as an annoying obstacle to the feel good moments.

The messes are going to be there.  The inconveniences.  The exhaustion.

And it's okay, because that's what life with kids is all about.

It's about loving them no matter what.
It's about being grateful for each moment I get to spend with them, whether that be disinfecting a filthy bathroom floor or snuggling up with a book.

Expect it, mama.

Expect to be tired.

Expect to work hard.

Expect life to be imperfect.

And when those chaotic moments come your way, they'll no longer seem like an inconvenience or a reason for a panic attack.  They'll just be another part of your messy, yet beautiful life.

A Stroller For a Growing Family (Evenflo Sibby Review)

This post was sponsored by Evenflo as part of an Influencer Activation for Influence Central. I received the Evenflo Sibby Travel System to facilitate my review.

Most of you know that we recently added another member to our family.  Now that I'm a mom of 5 children, I feel like I have a pretty good idea of what gear you need when you have a lot of young children!

In my opinion, a travel system is a must!  There is always need for a stroller for the baby, and when you have a toddler in the mix, it's nice to be able to let both of them ride.

When I was given the opportunity to review the Evenflo Sibby Travel System, I was really excited to check it out.

At first glance, the thing that interested me the most was that it had space for both the baby and toddler to ride, yet it wouldn't take up nearly as much room in my trunk as a double stroller.

Other things I like about the Evenflo Sibby Travel System:

• Gender neutral, classic fabric
  I thought the gray denim-like color was nice.  Being a mom of multiple children, I really prefer a gender neutral fabric so that I can use the stroller and car seat over and over no matter what gender subsequent children are.  It's also really nice to have something that is not too trendy so that it won't look weird in a few years.  Although it has a denim look to it, the fabrice is actually very light and breathable. (There are other colors of fabric available as well.)
• Comfortable handle height
  This is another important feature in a stroller.  You don't want to be stooped over as you push your little one around!
• Smooth ride
  I was very pleased with how smoothly the stroller rides and how easily the wheels swivel.  I have used some strollers that are honestly hard to steer.  It's embarrassing to be running a stroller into things because you can't get it to go where you want it to go!  I didn't have any problems at all with the Evenflo Sibby.
• Large storage basket
  This is another must when you are a mom of multilple children.  The amount of things you need to have with you requires a lot of space!  I was happy with how large the basket under the Evenflo Sibby was.
• Easy to adjust the seat up and down
  Depending on which child is riding in the stroller, I need to adjust the seat frequently.  A younger baby would be lying down more often, while a toddler will usually want to sit up but may get tired and need to  lie back too.  Just a quick pull on the cord on the back easily allows me to adjust the seat wherever it is needed.
• Large canopy
  I really love having so much shade over my child when we're out in the sun.  If I'm using the car seat with the stroller, I can completely cover the baby by using the canopy from both the stroller and the car seat combined.

What I'd like a little better:

• Canopy does not adjust easily
  The canopy does not pull up and down very easily.  You have to wrestle with it a little bit to get it to go where you want it to go.  This gets old really quick.
• Ride Along Board should be larger
  If the baby is lying back, there is no room at all for my toddler to ride.  Even with the stroller seat adjusted up, there is not much room at all for her to stand.  I think the ride along board should extend out a little further so that there is plenty of room to ride.

The Evenflo Sibby Travel System is available at Target.  You can check it out and watch a short video here.

How I Get My Kids to Actually Stay Quiet During Afternoon Quiet Time

I am unashamedly an introvert mom.

That means I start getting a bit jittery in the afternoons.  I have to have some quiet time without the constant “kid noise” in the background or I struggle to be sweet.  I need some time to recharge my batteries so I can head into the evening calm and collected.

But the big question is:

How do I implement a quiet time for the kids that is actually quiet?

Usually I have the smallest ones take a nap while the older ones read in their rooms.
But often the ones who are not required to take naps will come out of their room approximately 800 times, thus ensuring that quiet time is not exactly relaxing for mama.  They need a snack or have to go to the bathroom or have to tattle on a sibling about something.

Enter my latest lifesaver: Jonathan Park Audio Adventures

Jonathan Park audio adventures are so engaging for my kids that they don't want to get up from quiet time because they'll miss what happens next!

My oldest son (age 8) has been especially engrossed in the adventures.  He talks about them non-stop and asks me several times a day if he may listen to the next episode.  He's always trying to guess what is going to happen as he scours the descriptions on the backs of the cases to see if he can catch onto any clues about the next episode.

Why Mom Loves Jonathan Park Audio Adventures:

1. Character building – my children are being encouraged through the example of their “peers” on the audios to develop numerous Godly character traits such as perseverance, selflessness, courage, and more!
2. Teaches Biblical Creationism – a child may not be interested in a big term like “Apologetics”, but that is exactly what my children are learning through these exciting stories!  They're not only learning the truth about our world and its Creator; they're learning how to defend that truth!
3. All while keeping the kids quietly occupied! (And mom might secretly enjoy hearing the stories too when she's not busy catching a nap!)

What my kids think of Jonathan Park Audio Adventures:

I like it best when we get to the exciting parts where I wonder, “What's going to happen next?!!” -K. age 6

And I already mentioned how often my 8-year-old talks about the stories and how he asks several times a day if he may listen to the next episode.  With a strongly distractable personality, the fact that he can sit still for an entire afternoon with his attention captivated by the stories is impressive! (Even if he does sit on my kitchen counters so he can be right next to the CD player!)

As he saw me composing this blog post, he said, “That's how you keep us quiet?”  “Yes,”  I answered.  “It works!”

“Well, I like Jonathan Park!  I'm going to save my money so I can buy another set!”

What are the adventures like?

Well…why don't you decide?  Listen below to a trailer!  The level of excitement you hear is exactly how the adventures are the entire way through!

Who are Jonathan Park Audio Adventures for?

The adventures were specifically designed for ages 7-13, although younger children all the way through adults will enjoy them!

Are you ready to bless your family with highly entertaining, faith-building audio adventures?
Click here to get your first Series Pack 1 – over five hours of action-packed fun that will equip, educate, and unlock your kids’ imaginations!!

Disclosure: I received product and/or payment to facilitate this review.  As always, I only feature products our family personally uses and loves to share with my readers!

The Thing You May Not Know About Debilitating Back Pain During Pregnancy

I made my way out to my vehicle in the chiropractor parking lot as tears of frustration brimmed at the corners of my eyes.

I had just dropped a chunk of money on yet another adjustment and I felt zero relief from the pain in my lower back.

“You need to get in here more often”, they would tell me every time I went.

“Easy for you to say,” I thought.  “You're the one who's getting the money.  I'm paying money that I don't really have to spend and I've got nothing to show for it.”

I had already been splurging on twice-monthly visits as opposed to the typically prescribed monthly maintenance visit.  But this time I was in so much pain that I called only one week after my previous visit and went in for another adjustment.

I couldn't hold the tears in any longer.

“I've spent months in pain and I'm so tired of not being able to walk.  I can't run my household or take care of my children.  I keep getting adjusted and doing everything I'm supposed to do, but still this lower back pain persists through every pregnancy. I don't think anyone truly understands how bad it is.  I need help, but no one seems to get it.”

Not only has the pain been, well, painful, but it's embarrassing as well.

“How cute.  You're waddling already.”  I've heard that statement with every single pregnancy as I begin to waddle very early on.  They think I'm trying to accentuate my pregnancy because I'm so excited about it (I am, obviously, but that's not why I'm waddling.)  I'm waddling because I cannot walk.  My lower back is in horrible pain, people!  But instead I just smile, my face flushed with embarrassment.

As the pregnancy progresses and my belly grows larger and larger, the pain becomes worse and worse.  I know I should be exercising throughout the pregnancy, but even just a walk to the end of the driveway is almost more than I can handle.

So I settle in to “wait it out”. “I guess this is just the way it is until after the baby is born.”

But as I sat there that day in the chiropractor parking lot, I had reached the end of my patience.  Here I was at 35 weeks along – almost to the end of my pregnancy, but I just could not take the pain any more.  My back was so locked up that I had to take my hands and physically move my legs up stairs because they would not lift that high on their own.

When I got home I began to do some searching online to see if there was anything that could be done, but I became more discouraged than ever.

“Here I am almost to the end of my pregnancy, and I have no idea how I am going to deliver this baby.  I haven't been able to exercise, so my body is incredibly weak.  How am I going to go through labor?  My body won't have the strength to do this!”

Finally I decided to post in a Facebook group where a lot of my natural living blogger friends hang out.  I have been in that group for years, and we are all very close, with most of our chats having less to do about blogging than they do about seeking health advice or asking for prayer.

Within minutes I had my answer.

“You should get in touch with The Tummy Team.  You need to strengthen those core muscles so that your chiropractic adjustments will hold.  That will also take a lot of the pressure off your low back.”

“But I only have 5 weeks left in my pregnancy.  Is there any chance for relief in that amount of time?  And how can I get my body strong enough for labor in that amount of time?”

The answer I received gave me so much hope: “You are definitely not a lost cause!  You have 5 weeks left, and the Prenatal Course from The Tummy Team is 6 weeks long and will cross over nicely through birth.  I work closely with Kelly, and we have seen ladies experience dramatic relief after just 3-5 days of diligence in their exercises.”

I immediately got up off the bed where I was lying and got onto The Tummy Team website.

To further my excitement at having found some hope, I saw that they also offer a 2 week Prentatal Crash Course, specifically for women who are at the end of pregnancy but need some help preparing their body for labor and delivery.

“Wow!  It looks like it is possible to get prepared for labor and delivery even if I only had 2 weeks left!” I thought.

I sent an email to Kelly immediately, and within a day I had begun my first week of classes and exercises.

I have been in the program for only a few days so far, but I know it is going to help!

Already I am much more conscientious of how I carry myself, and I'm learning how to properly activate my core so there is not so much weight pulling on my back.

Whether you're at the beginning of your pregnancy or very close to the end, I know you will benefit from the resources at The Tummy Team.

I am really looking forward to finding some relief to the back pain, being stronger for labor and delivery, and having my body in a better position for recovery once the baby is born.

CHECK OUT THE TUMMY TEAM PRENATAL CORE TRAINING HERE.

Update March 2017: Baby is now 8 months old, so I think it's been long enough for me to give you an accurate update on how The Tummy Team helped the remainder of my pregnancy! 😉

How did it help the pain?

There was a noticeable difference in my level of back pain in just about a week!  Now, mind you, I was pretty bad off, so it's not like I went down to zero pain, but just learning the proper technique for activating my core (it's a different technique than a lot of people think) made a HUGE difference.  I was able to start walking a little more and build up some strength before labor and delivery.

How did it help labor and delivery?

I loved how the course teaches proper pushing technique so that you don't further damage your core during labor and create a long recovery time.  I felt that it really helped me.  Also, I have never felt so good after a birth.  You know that awful, jello-like feeling you have in your empty belly after the birth?  Learning how to splint after birth made a night and day difference.  Splinting my belly felt wonderful!

Do you see any additional benefits?

Yes! Now that I am no longer pregnant, I still have proper posture and core activation at the top of my mind.  I have greatly reduced the number of chiropractic adjustments I need because my stronger core keeps my back in alignment!  I'm still in the Facebook group that all Tummy Team course members receive access to, and Kelly is the sweetest thing ever.  She's always accessible for questions or a word of encouragement.

Are there any cons to the Tummy Team course?

The only thing that might be a deterrent to some people is the price.  You'll pay $149 for the course, plus Kelly recommends a tummy splint, which will be about $40.  Honestly, though, I find it to be a worthy investment.  (The relief I found, plus being able to reduce my amount of chiropractor visits made the course totally worth it.)

Some people may not like the fact that you only have access to your course for 6 weeks (plus an additional week of grace if I'm not mistaken.)  I personally found that to be a very smart way to run an online course because too many times I have signed up for something that gave me lifetime access, and then never actually completed it because I got too comfortable with the fact that I could come back if I got behind.  I liked the extra pressure to complete the class.  Plus, having lifetime access to the Facebook group, gives me additional education and encouragement now that my course is completed.

If you're experiencing debilitating back pain, first of all, let me say I am so sorry!  I know how miserable it is!

But I also want to let you know there is hope!  You will not regret placing yourself under the tender care of Kelly and her team.

CHECK OUT THE TUMMY TEAM PRENATAL CORE TRAINING HERE.

Dear Mom Who Got Nothing Done Today

Hey mama,

You had big plans for what you hoped to accomplish today, didn't you?
Maybe you carefully planned the agenda and got up a little early. You were so optimistic about the day.
But the other people in your family weren't really interested in your agenda and your plans were thwarted at every turn.

The kids were whining and arguing. Your normally smoothly running routine was just not working today.

You're frustrated right now as you look around and see that nothing…NOTHING! has been accomplished.

In fact, the house is messier than when you started, supper ended up being cold cereal, and you just want to crawl in bed and pretend this day didn't happen.

You know what, Mama?
A lot more than you realize had been accomplished today.

Your success as a mother cannot be measured by how clean the house was at the end of the day or what you served for supper.

Here's what you accomplished today in spite of leaving your to-do list completely untouched:

• You taught whining children how to control their emotions.
• You taught unkind children how to put others first.
• You taught disobedient children how to do what's right even when they don't feel like it.
• You taught lazy children how to be diligent in all that they do.

You loved when it was hard to love.
You reinforced lessons that your children need to learn.
You put food in little bellies.
You showed your children how to choose joy, patience and forgiveness.

And if perchance you blew it and lost your cool, you apologized and showed your children that you sometimes make the wrong choices too. And in doing so you also showed them how not to wallow in their mistakes, but to be thankful for grace, forgive themselves and move on.

And if you haven't done that yet, the good news is that it's never too late!

This day is not a loss!

You've added more building blocks to the crucial foundation that your children need for a successful adult life.

You probably don't feel like the wall has gotten any higher today. Progress in child training is painfully slow and you won't see any immediate results.

But sometime in the future this very day will be a part of who your children are.

And by God's grace they will be adults who have seen in your life and heard from your lips that a life worth living is one that follows hard after God.

I'd say teaching your children those lessons is a far cry from “getting nothing done.”

Don't despair, mama. You've done more today than you realize.

(I posted this on my Facebook page a couple days ago, and it seemed appropriate for this post:)